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Traumatic Events Could Be Stealing Your Voice

December 28, 20237 min read

Disclaimer* this is a heavy topic today but it needs to be heard.

Have you ever felt like you did not have a voice?  I have many times in my life.  Especially when I was growing up. I felt trapped and could not get out of my situation. I felt alone. I felt like no one heard me or cared. When we had our first child, I wanted nothing more than to let them have their own voice. I wanted to make sure they felt heard. Like most parents we don't want our kids to experience what we did, right? However, this is a hard expectation to live up to. I know this firsthand. We all have the potential to mess up our kids because of past junk. 

 What I am going to talk about today may be something you experienced or know someone who has. Whether it is a drunk parent beating the other parent or an angry father who has carried so much pain in his life and the only way he knows how to deal with it is to take it out on the children he loves so much... Or maybe a child that has been called names and beaten up by people around them.  Maybe a child has been called the daughter of the devil and they try hard to prove it by placing crosses in her yard. 

What about a group of neighborhood kids that expresses their anger for life by taking the pet or the one thing in life that you love and hurt it? Maybe it’s a child that has been raped over and over by family members or raped by a student in school.  Maybe it’s a teenager raped by members of their school team. Maybe the child is so afraid to tell someone for the fear of being believed or judged. Maybe, just maybe, there is a child or adult that feels left out by their friends and they start to internalize, wondering what is wrong with them.   

Maybe there is so much more going on in the world that we choose to ignore it and sit on a pedestal, like people should just change or stop having excuses. 

 What I know with certainty after coaching hundreds of people is that people are dealing with very heavy burdens and have no idea why they can’t get past them. If I am good at anything, it is pulling people from the burden of chaos.

 I am not telling you the world is bad at all. We are blessed by so much good. I am a firm believer that, if you allow it, GOOD can come out of BAD!  That is my story.  GOOD came out of my bad with a faith that is rock solid, however, no matter how hard I try my past affects me. It's either serving me or taking away from me. I choose to make sure that it is serving me when I can.   

The list goes on and people feel trapped. Let me paint another picture: 

What if it’s a child of a screaming parent who spanks them because they have had a bad day or the house is a mess?  What about the child that actually allows herself to be raped to protect her sister. Maybe a child thinks they have a voice and gets involved with the wrong crowd begging for acceptance, blaming herself years later for all of her bad choices.

What about the voices of all the people out there who hurt men, women, and children?  Have you ever thought that they have been hurt bad themselves?  The voice they carry now is hurting others, all because of their traumatic events.  They don’t know how to be different. They have already given up on life.  The voice they carry is the voice they have been taught by the actions of others. 

BUT…people were created for good. They were not born into this world to do bad things to others.  Life happens and experiences change people, and sometimes that change is negative.  

Did you know that most of our influencers and leaders have very strong stories of traumatic events or hurts at some point in their life? Those hurts gave them the potential to help change the world. Their passion comes from finally having a voice and newfound hope. 

Today I write this in tears because people just don't get it. They really have no idea what is going on in the lives of people.  They forgot what it was like to not have a voice or feeling like there is no way out.  Today I have been reminded that at one time in my life I had no voice and there are leaders, children, and families struggling to find theirs. We are living in a hurt world. A hurt world that needs to adjust its filter and see things in a new way.  

All my life the one thing I have always had is hope and faith. Hope that one day everything will be different.  I love the voice I have today! I love to fight for myself and others.  I have a voice that knows what I want. I have a voice that does not let me quit.  A voice that has given me so much to be proud of. I am so excited to be living the life I am. I have a unique, authentic, passionate, sassy VOICE!  I have things happening in my life that I never thought possible and guess WHAT?  My traumatic childhood along with God gave me this voice.  

This morning I find myself thinking about all those children that don’t have a voice. Or the people who have lost it due to an event that has happened in their life. I am telling you from the bottom of my heart to fight for the voice in your life. What comes after is so worth it even through all the struggles.  You can have a voice and can be the person you were created to be.

There is no greater feeling for me than the feeling of being a child of heavy pain and surviving.

Can you imagine being a woman who will impact everyone that she comes in contact with?  A woman who has a way about her that is like no other. A woman who fears nothing because God is present in her life.  A woman who knows what she has sacrificed as a child and has been given a world of possibilities.  A woman that owes everything to God and her husband of 22 years.  A woman who is THANKFUL to all the many people who support and love her every day. Most of the traumatic events I speak of today happened to me. I have freed myself from the burden of thinking that people have it easy but none of us do. 

I dedicate this blog to all of you.

Today and forever find your voice that is dying to get out. Find it and free it.  Fight through all the things happening in your life financially, emotionally, spiritually, in health, marriage, or family. Whatever it is, find your voice through it and let it take control of your desire to be who you were created to be.  You can fight, you can win!!!!!

You deserve to have a voice.


Ps. If you are struggling with this blog or want to share your story, reach out to me. I would love to hear your heart.

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Coach YOURSELF with these questions:

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Keep growing as a leader the world needs the rockstar in YOU!

  • Has trauma affected you?  

  • What has your past hurt given you?

  • What can you do with your story?

I would love to hear your thoughts! 

Coach Leisa!

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Leisa Jenkins

Wife, Mom, #1 Best Selling Author, Life & Leadership Coach, Rockstar!

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